Preparing for the New Year With a Kinder Mindset Towards Yourself

As the New Year approaches, many of us start setting resolutions with aspirations for self-improvement, often fuelled by the desire for rapid changes. While this can be inspiring, it can also lead to pressure, unrealistic expectations, and self-criticism. A kinder mindset is essential for setting resolutions that truly nature growth, wellbeing and self-compassion, rather than creating frustration or guilt.


This year, consider creating a new approach: setting resolutions that prioritise kindness, patience, and a genuine commitment to your wellbeing. In this post, we will explore why a kinder mindset is transformative and share practical ways to set compassionate goals that set you up for success.

Why a Kinder Mindset Matters for New Year’s Resolutions

Traditional New Year’s resolutions often focus on achieving quick results or drastic changes, which can create a “win or lose” mindset. This approach frequently leads to self-criticism, especially if resolutions are abandoned or results fall short of expectations. A kinder mindset allows you to approach your resolutions with gentleness and patience, promoting self-acceptance regardless of the outcome.


When you’re kinder to yourself, you’re more likely to set realistic goals, embrace gradual progress, and celebrate small wins, all of which build resilience and self-worth. In other words, a kind mindset doesn’t just improve the success of your resolutions, it also creates a healthier relationship with yourself.

Shifting from Criticism to Compassion in Goal Setting

Here are some strategies for making the New Year a time to cultivate self-compassion and realistic, nurturing goals:

  • Reflect on Past Resolutions and Self-Compassion
    Start by reflecting on past New Year’s resolutions, especially those that may have felt overwhelming or unattainable. Rather than focusing on what didn’t work, approach these reflections with self-compassion and curiosity.
    Exercise: Ask yourself what you learned from previous attempts. What elements of those goals were helpful, and which could have been gentler? This reflection can help you set intentions that are better aligned with your current needs and values.
  • Set Intentions Instead of Resolutions
    Intentions, unlike resolutions, are more about your approach to life rather than specific outcomes. They focus on how you want to feel and act rather than strict benchmarks. Intentions provide a gentle guiding principle that creates consistency and kindness, no matter the result.
    Example: Instead of “I will lose 15lbs,” try and intention like, “I will prioritise my wellbeing by listening to my body’s needs and treating it with respect.” This shift emphasises self-care and makes success less dependent on one rigid goal.
  • Choose Self-Care as Your Foundation
    Many resolutions focus on achieving external goals, often at the expense of self-care. This year, consider setting self-care as a foundational goal, with smaller, more specific goals branching off from it. Self-care goals nurture mental and physical wellbeing, providing the energy and mindset to pursue other aspirations from a place of health.
    Tip: Start with small, sustainable self-care practices such as taking breaks, setting boundaries, or establishing a simple bedtime routine. These foundational practices can reinforce a kind mindset by ensuring that your goals don’t come at the cost of your wellbeing.
  • Prioritise Process Over Perfection
    It’s common to get caught up in perfectionism, which can make any slip-up feel like a failure. Shifting your focus to the process itself, rather than flawless execution, encourages learning, growth, and self-acceptance.
    Exercise: Create process-oriented goals, such as journaling about your journey or noting one thing you’re grateful for each day. Recognising the beauty in the journey makes the path more fulfilling, helping you stay motivated without pressure.
  • Practice Daily Self-Compassionate Affirmations
    The way you talk to yourself has a powerful impact on your mindset and resilience. Practising self-compassionate affirmations can help you stay grounded in a kinder mindset, even when challenges arise.
    Example Affirmations:
    -     I am allowed to take my time and honour my own pace
    - My worth is not tied to what I accomplish
    - I am deserving of kindness, patience, and love
    Repeating these affirmations can help reframe negative self-talk, especially when things don’t go as planned. You may find it helpful to keep affirmations somewhere visible, like on a mirror or in a journal.
  • Celebrate Small Wins and Progress
    It’s easy to overlook small successes in favour of larger milestones, but these small wins are vital for building confidence and motivation. Each step in the right direction deserves recognitions, even if it’s as simple as drinking enough water for the day or taking a short walk.
    Tip: Consider keeping a “wins journal,” where you record your small achievements and moments of self-kindness. Reviewing these entries can serve as a reminder of your progress, encouraging you to stay positive and motivated.
  • Create Goals Rooted in Values, Not Expectations
    Goals rooted in personal values, rather than societal expectations, are often more sustainable and fulfilling. Take some time to identify what truly matters to you, such as health, creativity, community, or learning. Setting goals that align with your core values leads to more meaningful and satisfying progress.
    Exercise: Write down your core values and brainstorm resolutions that support them. For example, if one of your values is creativity, your goal might be to spend 10 minutes a day working on a hobby you enjoy, like painting or writing.
'Happy New Year' In yellow and orange font with pink lines around it and orange stars.

Overcoming Challenges with Self-Compassion

Even with the best intentions, challenges will arise. Practising self-compassion through these difficulties ensures that setbacks don’t lead to self-criticism or feelings of failure. Here are some ways to maintain kindness toward yourself when things get tough:

  • Acknowledge Emotions: Give yourself permission to feel frustrated, disappointed, or discouraged without judgement. Acknowledging these feelings help you process them rather than pushing them aside.
  • Reframe Setbacks: Remind yourself that setbacks are part of growth. Instead of viewing a challenge as a failure, ask what you can learn from it and how it might guide you forward.
  • Adjust Goals When Necessary: Life is unpredictable, and circumstances may change. Adapting goals to fit your current situations doesn’t mean you’ve failed, it means you’re listening to your needs.
  • Practise Forgiveness: If you find yourself being self-critical, pause and practice forgiveness. Remind yourself that you’re human and that progress isn’t always linear.

Preparing for a Kind New Year

As you look forward to the New Year, give yourself permission to approach your resolutions with a kinder, more compassionate mindset. Remember that true growth is not about drastic change or perfection, but about showing up with consistency, patience, and self-respect.


By embracing a kinder mindset, you’re laying the foundation for sustainable change and a healthier relationship with yourself. So, let this New Year be one where you’re as kind to yourself as you are to others, and may your goals reflect your commitment to self-love, balance, and lasting well-being.


Here’s to a New Year of self-compassion, resilience, and joy - one step at a time.